Blogging for me ...

A little break in the Haven Blog Conference recap posts ... to talk about why I went.  I love my blog!  I love to write, I love to read other blogs ... I love to be create, I love to be inspired.  My husband commented this morning that I never sit still.  It's not uncommon for me to completely tear apart the house simply because I got inspired to try that piece of furniture in another room.  And that starts a storm of moving furniture.  When I call the boys from upstairs they groan and are convinced I will make them carry something.  And I will ... 

But I digress ... 
Oh, and yes I am adding in amazing pictures so you won't fall asleep with just my words.  Pictures of things from my Pinterest boards ... and things I love.  

Why I blog ...

I started my blog seven years ago to document my life as a mom.  I wrote about what we did, where we went and what is what like with three kids and one of them special needs.  It was good for me and one day I will sit down and reread all I wrote.  It was basically an online journal complete with pictures.  I joined a summer swap years ago and met the precious blogger Aunt Grits ... Maggi.  We instantly bonded and became friends.  She is pint sized and full of energy and my go to for all things dirt related.  I also met the amazing Preppy Grammy who has lifted me up for years with her love for my family!

Then I just got tired.  At the time I was taking our middle child to therapy three days a week after school and juggling two other kids.  I would pick him up from school at 2 and return home after therapy at 6.  This is also about the same time I stopped cooking amazing meals every night ... I was just tired.  

I picked it up again after a while because I simply felt guilty.  I was sure my three total readers missed me.  I owed it to them.  All of my friends knew I wrote a blog but none of them wanted to read it.  It was about my daily life and since they were there for every bit of my daily life it wasn't something they needed to read.  

Then I revamped.  Stopped writing about what I did every day and started talking about the house, or people I liked or things that inspired me.  And that worked for a while.  And then I got burned out again.  

I was sure no one was reading it and I just didn't have the passion for blogging.  When I decided to join the One Room Challenge last October as a linking partner I blogged like crazy once a week.  I immediately got hooked.  People commented like mad and emailed me and I was energized.  My grandmother had just passed away in June and I needed something to focus on.  I put all my energy into creating that room and it was so good for me.  That room is amazing.  My best friends saw me light after months of darkness.  It was something I needed to do and it worked.  

And then I was exhausted and tired and the holidays were here.  The kids were super busy and I just didn't have the time to focus on me.  I did what tons of other wives and mothers do and I put myself last on the list.  But I feel like that had been happening for a while.  Slowly since I delivered a special needs baby I gradually put myself last day by day.  I had three kids and a traveling husband and I felt like I had to be selfless daily.   As in put everyone else before myself.  Wrong, so very wrong.

Fast forward from the One Room Challenge in October to February of the next year.  I was exhausted from the holidays, kids' schedule galore and the hubs travel schedule.  Then on top of that I got sick. Like stranded in the Nordstrom bathroom going to collapse sick.  For weeks I was nauseous and felt horrible all the time.  No doctor could make sense of it.  They all thought I was run down and exhausted.  Turns out five months later it was something completely different but this was a huge wake up call for me.  I had put myself last for so long I didn't know how to put myself first any more. I didn't know how to take of me.  No one had put me last but me and I had no one to blame but myself. 

My best friend Lance sat me down one night on a bar stool in our local joint and really talked to me.  I was sick, scared, tired, drained, sad and needed some serious kick in the pants.  And he gave it to me sitting next to me on that bar stool.  He told me my blog was good and creative and that I was too.  He told me other people needed to see the same things he sees everyday.  He told me I inspired him.  He told me to write.  

And I did.  And it works.  I have a schedule so that sitting down to write isn't daunting.  It's my voice and my silliness and the things that I love.  It's thrifting and design, clothes and flowers, eating and drinking, family and best friends.  And I love it.

He also told me to pick up all the things that worry me, scare me and paralyze me and carry them over and nail them to the cross.  And to put on my big girl panties, some bright pink lipstick and amazing perfume, to laugh and to be me.  And to share all of this with you.

And I am and have been for months.  And I feel better than I have in a long time.  

My point in all of this ... 
1.  Take care of you no matter what. 
2.  Do what you love, find time for it.
3.  Surround yourself with only those who make you better.
4.  Share what you love with others, maybe they will love it just as much as you do!

Thank you for supporting me, emailing me and texting me!  Your love and unending support is good for my heart!  And thank you for reading this blog ...

and letting me share myself with you!


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